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Post by certegy on Jun 6, 2008 9:53:09 GMT 12
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Post by certegy on Jun 14, 2008 3:21:34 GMT 12
An 85-year-old man was requested by his doctor for a sperm count as part of his physical exam. The doctor gave the man a jar and said, 'Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow.' The next day the 85-year-old man reappeared at the doctor's office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as on the previous day. The doctor asked what happened and the man explained, 'Well Doc, it's like this - first I tried with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing. Then I asked my wife for help. She tried with her right hand, then with her left- still nothing. She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in, then with her teeth out - still nothing. We even called up Arleen, the lady next door and she tried too, first with both hands, then an armpit, and she even tried squeezing it between her knees, but still nothing.' The doctor was shocked! 'You asked your neighbour?' The old man replied, 'Yep, and none of us could get that damned jar open.' Acknowledgements: Bilbo (MB 2 Classic)
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Post by certegy on Jun 19, 2008 3:26:23 GMT 12
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Post by certegy on Jun 19, 2008 3:41:53 GMT 12
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Post by certegy on Jun 27, 2008 16:12:31 GMT 12
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Post by certegy on Jun 27, 2008 17:28:46 GMT 12
LITTLE Mark ON MATHS
A teacher asks her class, 'If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and you shoot one of them, how many will be left?' She calls on little MARK.
He replies, 'None, they will all fly away with the first gunshot.'
The teacher replies, 'The correct answer is 4, but I like your thinking.'
Then little MARK says, 'I have a question for YOU.
There are 3 women sitting on a bench having ice cream:
One is delicately licking the sides of the triple scoop of ice cream. The second is gobbling down the top and sucking the cone.
The third is biting off the top of the ice cream. Which one is married?'
The teacher, blushing a great deal, replied, 'Well, I suppose the one that's gobbled down the top and sucked the cone.'
To which Little MARK replied, 'The correct answer is 'the one with the Wedding ring on,' but I like your thinking.'
Acknowledgement: Bilbo
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Post by certegy on Jun 27, 2008 17:32:27 GMT 12
To faithfully search the internet for funny material for yops reading pleasure.
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Post by ivyplus on Jun 27, 2008 17:32:35 GMT 12
;D
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Post by ivyplus on Jun 27, 2008 17:38:50 GMT 12
To faithfully search the internet for funny material for yops reading pleasure. Thanks for that. I like to look at funny things.
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Post by certegy on Jun 27, 2008 17:41:30 GMT 12
Me too - when I'm not working I'm always looking at funny posts/pictures/jokes
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Post by ivyplus on Jun 27, 2008 17:41:51 GMT 12
Saving on petrol:
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Post by certegy on Jun 27, 2008 17:42:31 GMT 12
I find that laughter is way better than my current regime of anti-depressants ;D
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Post by certegy on Jun 27, 2008 17:43:34 GMT 12
Saving on petrol: OMG that picture reminds me of that poor donkey who is up in the air because his cart is too heavy.
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Post by ivyplus on Jun 27, 2008 17:47:56 GMT 12
I find that laughter is way better than my current regime of anti-depressants ;D Yes it's good to laugh and stay clear from any anti-depressants. I have a friend in Switzerland and she is on anti-depressants. I don't think she can get off them again. It makes me sad. Here is what works for me when I am down: - Looking and appreciating nice things, like flowers, sceneries - Listening to my favourite songs - Smelling on nice essential oils - Reading happy things and avoiding any negative things - Going for a walk - Calling my dog and knowing that he really loves me whatever I have done There is much more like that - Eating some chocolate (but there is caution to consider) - Drinking (best not too alcoholic)
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Post by ivyplus on Jun 27, 2008 17:48:48 GMT 12
OMG that picture reminds me of that poor donkey who is up in the air because his cart is too heavy. Yes I know which one! ;D Poor donkey!
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Post by certegy on Jun 27, 2008 17:54:21 GMT 12
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Post by ivyplus on Jun 27, 2008 17:58:32 GMT 12
Sorry I am lost. I know know what to guess hope the others can. I like chocolate fish!
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Post by certegy on Jun 27, 2008 18:03:59 GMT 12
Actually I will get my suppliers to ship them out - but this will be interesting.
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Post by certegy on Jun 27, 2008 18:09:19 GMT 12
I find that laughter is way better than my current regime of anti-depressants ;D Yes it's good to laugh and stay clear from any anti-depressants. I have a friend in Switzerland and she is on anti-depressants. I don't think she can get off them again. It makes me sad. Here is what works for me when I am down: - Looking and appreciating nice things, like flowers, sceneries - Listening to my favourite songs - Smelling on nice essential oils - Reading happy things and avoiding any negative things - Going for a walk - Calling my dog and knowing that he really loves me whatever I have done There is much more like that - Eating some chocolate (but there is caution to consider) - Drinking (best not too alcoholic) for the great advice sweet
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Post by ivyplus on Jun 27, 2008 18:20:44 GMT 12
Actually I will get my suppliers to ship them out - but this will be interesting. I will keep an eye on it!
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